So, you fell for a narcissist’s tricks? And now you’re stuck in a whirlpool of shame and self-loathing, wondering if you’re the most gullible person alive? Well, stop right there! Let me tell you something important: the very reason the narcissist targeted you is because you are the polar opposite of foolish and weak!
In fact, it’s more likely that you are incredibly smart, attractive, and dynamic. You’re probably the kind of person who’s kind, compassionate, and empathetic – basically, a Type A powerhouse with a long list of enviable traits. Narcissists are like moths to a flame when it comes to people who shine brightly and make them look good. They crave that boost to their self-esteem and validation of their inflated self-importance.
Contrary to popular belief, narcissists don’t go after weak, insecure people. Where’s the fun in that? Their twisted game is to break down someone who seemingly has it all. According to Shannon Thomas, author of “Healing from Hidden Abuse,” they target your best qualities and try to turn them against you. For them, it’s all about the thrill of dismantling someone strong and beautiful.
Now, if you’re a Type A personality, you’re likely one of life’s go-getters. You’re intrinsically motivated, a real powerhouse, and always see the best in people and situations. Narcissists love this because you’ll see the best in them – no matter what. And let’s be real, that’s a narcissist’s dream come true!
Type A’s tend to go above and beyond for the people in their lives. You’re willing to give more than you receive, making you prime prey for narcissists who love freeloading. They can just kick back and let you do all the hard work.
And if you’re an empath, well, narcissists hit the jackpot with you. Kind, caring, and endlessly compassionate, you’re like a never-ending supply of admiration for them. When things start going south, you, being the loving and self-critical empath, might even believe it’s your fault. You’ll double down on your efforts to save the relationship, thinking more love will heal everything. Meanwhile, the narcissist revels in the chaos they’ve created.
So, let’s reframe this, shall we?
Are you a smart, dynamic Type A personality brimming with empathy and compassion? Should you feel ashamed of that? Absolutely not! You are amazing! Unfortunately, these wonderful traits made you a target for a narcissist. But here’s the silver lining: you’re wiser now. You know their game. There will always be people who try to take advantage of your kindness and bask in your glow, but don’t let that dull your shine.
You’ve got this from here on out! Keep being your awesome self, and never let anyone dim your light.